Erin Valkner Photography

View Original

Jessica G. | Life Inspired

I’ve got to admit, when Jessica and I first met to talk about doing her shoot for this project, I was a bit nervous.  I mean, she was voted Missoula’s best Wedding Photographer this year!  If you haven’t met her, let me just tell you, she is one of the sweetest, most genuine people you will find.  The real deal.  Her thoughtfulness and willingness to be open made it feel a bit like talking to an old friend.

And it is no wonder her photography is so amazing.  She obviously loves what she does and it shows in all of her work.  (J. Willis Photography -Here is her website, and her Facebook page)

So it’s funny.  During her photo shoot we talked about how awkward it can feel to be in front of the camera.  Even for someone who ALWAYS has a camera around.  Anyway, she without a doubt rocked her photo shoot and we had a blast!

As always, if you're interested in being a part of this project, or know someone who might, contact me today!  You can find all the details HERE!

Oh, and she did her own hair & make up too!

Without further ado, I am honored to introduce you to the incredibly talented and strong beyond measure (and beautiful), Jessica.

When did you realize that your life was being held back by fear or self-doubt, and what kept you from moving forward?  

I realized this when I was absolutely terrified of doing anything outside of my comfort zone. Even going on a regular family shoot I would get the nervous shakes.

What triggered you to no longer live a life of fear or self-doubt?  

In 2012 I lost my husband in a motorcycle accident. Nothing in life can prepare you for that kind of loss.. With that came lots of fear. Lots of questions of what I would do, how I would live my life.  I had no clue what was next and felt frozen in life where everything around you was moving at a normal pace, but felt high speed.  As my days became weeks, weeks became months, months became years.. I've learned to deal with fear. Nothing in my life can be as scary as living through a death of the most important person in my life. If I could do that, I can do anything.  It was easier to ignore the fear and talk myself out of the fear. It was almost like this.."Really Jessica? You've lived through so much more. Put the fear away, and do it."  Basically, shut up.. Refocus and go.

There are moments in my life where I still deal with it, but it no longer paralyzes me.  I think we will always have fear and self-doubt but once you learn to channel it differently in your mind, then that's where you can push it out of the way.

What did you have to let go of in order to take the leap to move forward?

I had to let go of what I couldn't control. Losing Troy put that into perspective for me big time.  It was like someone ripped him out of my hands as hard as I was trying to white knuckle hold on.. Life won, and I had to let go of the situation, and the pain. Which is amazingly freeing.  When you let go, you can breathe the fresh air, and stretch, and feel human again.

What did you find on the other side of fear that made it worth it?

I found a whole new person! Someone that has courage and adventure! I love traveling and prior to losing Troy even that scared me to go anywhere by myself! I can do that now, and be by myself and feel comfortable in my own skin and surroundings. I actually like doing things by myself. I mean don't get me wrong, having a companion is AMAZING but it's also nice riding solo.

What would you tell someone (or your former self) who still feels held back by fear or self-doubt?

Fear is a façade and a liar. Everything you want and can have is on the other side of that magic mirror, you just have to walk through it.

erin-valkner-photography

Is there anything else you would like to share?  

I just wanted to maybe add that when this happened in my life so many people came forward to help. People I really didn't know.. Helping a stranger. Thank you! I had so much love and support and continue to have so much love and support. Through my heavy stages of Grieving I felt all that, it was amazing. I don't think I can say enough "thank you’s" to even add up to how it feels and felt. If someone is having a hard time and is completely scared of whatever in life that is staring them down, walk them through it. -or- if someone loses someone and a hat is being passed around for donations even $10 helps, and it's so, so appreciated! It's so humbling when a community comes together to help.

originally published 08/14/2016