Roxanne B. | Life Inspired Project

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What can I say about Roxanne?  Anyone that knows her will agree, she's just a delightful person!  Beautiful, smart, funny, talented... the list goes on and on!  And she's just a hoot to hang out with... I think we did more talking and laughing than we did shooting at her photo session!  I love all of the props she brought in for her 50's styled shoot - so much fun! If you're interested in nominating yourself or someone else for this project, you can find all the details HERE!  And don't hesitate to contact me today!!!

Without further ado, I present to you, Roxanne!

woman with vintage apron and cookbook erin valkner photography

When did you realize that your life was being held back by fear or self-doubt, and what kept you from moving forward?  I have to live a life of authenticity, one of purpose.  When I can't find the purpose in what is happening around me or in my life, I don't feel authentic.   We were trying to live like everybody else.  The modern way that society tells you is the right way.  Both parents work, kids go to daycare or school.  They all say live this way, like us, and you'll be happy! Like we are! I never was though, it felt more like a role I was supposed to play.  It wasn't authentic for me.  An authentic life for me, is as a mom/wife/homemaker, looking like I'm starring in my very own fifties sitcom.   I cook, clean, bake, sew, garden and homeschool my boys.  It's a life of tradition, with my husband working outside the home and me working inside the home.  Ironically, by returning to a life of traditional values, we ended up living one that is unconventional to many in today's world.

What triggered you to no longer live a life of fear or self-doubt?  It was about a year and a half ago that we began to notice the boys' behavior changing.  They had never liked school, but they began to actually have full on meltdowns in the morning, complete with crying, resisting getting ready, & refusing to pack their bags. Every single morning, it was getting out of control.  You might expect that from a kindergartner, but not a fourth grader and a second grader.  It was exhausting and most days I showed up to work wiping tears from my eyes, just heartbroken that something wasn't going right at school for them.  They couldn't articulate it, and the teachers denied anything was the matter at all.  But I knew.  I knew I had to trust my gut instinct on this and that was all the reason I ever needed.  I knew we were going to have to make a big change, a course correction, if you will, and find a whole new direction for the future of our family.

What did you have to let go of in order to take the leap to move forward?  I had to let go of any preconceived notions of what my family's future was going to look like.  I had to let go of my own doubts that I wouldn't be successful at teaching my boys.  I didn't have all the answers and I was fully aware of what a daunting task this was going to be.  I had to face the fact that despite years of trying to get my foot in the door with a good job, I'd finally found one that was perfect for me, but I was still going to have to let it go.   Because the reality is, they can always find somebody else to do your job.  And they will, no matter how important you think you are, a business has to stay in business, and everybody is replaceable to them.  When you are a mother, however, you are irreplaceable.  For that reason, I gave up.  I gave up my job, and I gave up on what our modern society says success is.  I went with the way of  life that has value.  The one that can make the biggest difference and have the most lasting impact.  One where I'm just simply Mom.  My boys are my greatest gift.  They will also be my lasting legacy.  Long after I'm gone, I know I will never be forgotten.  Because of two boys who call me Mom.

What did you find on the other side of fear that made it worth it?  I found a life worth living.  I found the things in life that are priceless.  Seeing my boys curiosity become reignited in the world around them.  Listening to their many plans for what they want to do when they grow up, where they'll live, and what they'll do.  And hearing them tell me "thank you mom, we love you." And I see the truth of it in their hearts.  They know there is a big, bright future out there waiting for them now.  They will get their chance to live a life filled with their own purpose.  I still have times when all of my best intentions go awry and I question my sanity in this decision, but even in those times I have a profound sense of appreciation.

beautiful woman in vintage dress with vintage sewing patterns erin valkner photography

What would you tell someone (or your former self) who still feels held back by fear or self-doubt? 

Many parents in similar situations to ours say they can't afford to stay home in order to home-school.  I always said, "I couldn't afford not to."  There is no doubt about it, sacrifices will have to be made no matter what you choose in life.  I will always choose to sacrifice material things rather than my well being and that of my kids.  It's a life of quality, not quantity.  And it's a life lived on purpose.  Find your purpose and pursue it relentlessly.  I won't say it's easy, but I never expected life to be easy, I expected it to be worth it, and it is.

Is there anything else you would like to share? During my photo shoot, I kept having to be reminded to bring my chin down when you would take the picture.  You explained that each person has a different default they go to when facing the camera and mine was I would lift my chin up.  When I got home and was telling my husband about how it went I told him that part and was laughing about it when it all of a sudden hit me, why I do that.  It was an unconscious thing that I hadn't realized I did until it was pointed out to me, but I do it because that is how I live and what I believe. No matter what life throws my way, I face it with my chin up, eyes on the horizon and my brightest smile.   -xoxo

beautiful woman in vintage car erin valkner photography
beautiful woman with vintage car erin valkner photography
beautiful woman with vintage car erin valkner photography
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